Dating after weight loss
Practical about exactly how your dress size will mathematically compute in the mind of the modern man?
I would rather live in the real world, which is ruled by a wicked laugh and a faint whiff of honeysuckle and a chilled pint hitting a man’s lips, along with the vague sensation that he’s brighter and stronger than he usually is, because he’s sitting across from a woman with beautiful eyes and a sick sense of humor who really, really gets him.
I have a plus-size friend who tells me there is nothing — NOTHING — like showing up for an online date and reading on the guy’s face, “Oh, you’re too big for me.” She tells me I can’t possibly know a thing about that feeling, and I trust that she’s right.
Which is not very serviceable at my age.) I watch friends of mine find partners and I feel like they’ve been given access to a manual that will only be open to me if … I’ve always been heavier than normal, but after maintaining in the 12–14 range for a long while, through all the teenage and twentysomething trips to Weight Watchers and ambient sucking-up of information that I don’t even want to read from the beauty-industrial complex, I have landed in that gray area where the top of “regular” sizing and the bottom of “plus” sizing overlap. “I’ll lose the weight,” I think sometimes, “and that will make people less repelled by me.” But I have trouble exercising because my schedule is unpredictable and sometimes I need to be working for unbroken stretches to tackle big projects.
Hails says other matches did the same when she sent photos of herself in underwear. It would be mortifying.” While her instinct to preempt in-person rejection is understandable, dating expert Julia Bekker says singles should not be sending semi-nude selfies to strangers, regardless of size.
“If someone loves you they will love you whether you’re bigger or smaller, for better or for worse,” Bekker, owner of NYC matchmaking service Hunting Maven, tells The Post.
The guy who won’t sleep with you because you’re overweight is not a far cry from the guy who will only sleep with you because you’ve got a hot body.
Either way, you feel like the main event, the REAL YOU, is a footnote.